It is late August, so naturally the department stores are gearing up for Christmas. Seriously, I heard there are Christmas trees for sale at Costco.
This summer has been one of the most fantastic summers I have had in some time. I wasn’t sweating my butt off in jeans, I got to wear some cute dresses and rock some short shorts. My tan line actually extended north of my ankles and I bought a bathing suit that I don’t mind wearing. But I am ready for fall. I appreciate each season for what it offers but there is that imaginary line that I hit when I feel it is time to bid farewell to one season and embrace the next.
At this point in my weight loss/fitness journey, I am as close as I have been to being literally and physically half my size. Safe to say that should I lose this last 6 pounds, the summer clothes I am wearing right now will still see sunlight again next year. A few pounds will not make that much of a difference to the fit of them. I couldn’t be more excited for that. Investing in nicer pieces has been much easier this summer than last because of this fact. I recall last summer I was in the midst of continuous weight loss. I was often in that awkward “in between size” phase for most of it. God, the annoying belts I would have to wear! I hate belts. Especially in the summer. It just made it hotter and added more to fuss with when you really have to pee. When you drink as much water as I do, that is a serious issue.
When I couldn’t take belts any longer it was off to my seamstress to get her to take in the waist of my capris and jeans. I was there about once a month last summer. The money I spent on alterations likely paid her cable bill. Not that I was losing weight at such a rapid or unhealthy rate, but each month I was losing at least 8 to 10 pounds. While I could get alterations done once, even twice to jeans, there is a point at which the 2 pockets of the ass are practically on top of each other that you need to throw in the towel. I stretched the wear of these clothes because I knew that investing in anything else would be pointless as I wouldn’t be wearing them for a second season. I am so glad that’s over with!!
Shopping for clothes is something I look forward to now. It has become an addiction! I find it’s getting easier to eye pieces hanging on store racks and deciding if they’ll fit. That actually took way longer to figure out than I hoped it would. I imagine the store associates got pretty ticked off with me not knowing my own size. I would have to take a small, medium and large of everything I was interested in into the change room with me. I’m sure I was their least favourite customer.
The emotional high connected to buying new clothes is pretty amazing too! I imagine this is what most teen girls feel like about their wardrobe. Seeing as I missed having all this fun when I was their age, part of me feels like I am making up for lost time. I kid you not, I will stand facing my clothes, all hung up in my closet and skim my eyes and hands over the fabric of these clothes. Touching them, loving them. Holding them out in front of me and practically giggling over how small they appear on the hanger. Sue me if you think that is a bit self indulgent. Never in a million years would I think I would find myself enjoying this particular activity.
I have gotten the lectures about not being too focused on the size it says on my tag. But I’m sorry – I get giddy with joy at the sight of the “M”s on my shirts and even a couple “S”s hanging in my closet. For those who are new to my blog, I was once a 2 XL. It is an incredible change -saving the space alone is incredible…means I can buy more clothes! I have come so freaking far that I think I get to enjoy this small fact. I do not by any means base my entire existence around fitting into smaller sizes, but I smile a little bigger picking out my wardrobe from day to day.
But tucked away, in the back of my closet, you’ll still find a couple XXL’s. They exist as a reminder of how far I’ve come. This helps motivate me and ground me at the same time. As much as there are so many painful memories when it comes to buying clothes (or in my case, not buying them) in years past, I never want to fully forget.